This year has been full of ups and downs. The kids are finding new passions. I am finding myself. Ian is even learning to find himself. the path we are choosing to follow this year will hopefully bring us o tour ultimate goals.
The last couple of months have been rough for Audrey. She has always loved hockey and was jealous when her brother got to try it, and now play. watching him, she has tried to persuade me to let her play too, but with the hype her coaches have about her tennis playing, I have been against it. I made a deal with her about learning to apply makeup and learn to walk in heels so she could learn to skate and i think she decided against hockey. She still loves the game, and to watch it, but I think she's realizing that her path is taking her elsewhere. Monday she goes back to the Veterinarian twice a week to do kind of like an apprenticeship to start getting her hours for post graduate school. She even has a new laptop to start keeping track of everything.
Lucas, on the other hand, is learning about hockey, devouring it. He has gotten books on the subject from the library, he dreams about it, and loves to talk about it. He takes skating lessons and is learning to play. He met his cousin that played goalie for years. He wants to be a goalie. He learned about Patrick Roy, and now that is his idol. This weekend he will hopefully gear up for the first time as a goalie. He's bringing his grades up, and his behavior in school is better.
I Never thought I would be the mom that was always there to do everything. I have wanted it. I'm still afraid of it, but I'm working on it. I work two to three days a week, less than twelve hours total, and make what I did at the hospital. I love it. I can drive Lucas to Fremont for hockey and skate lessons two to three times a week, I can run Audrey to the vet, pick her up from band on Wednesdays. Lucas doesn't have to sit on a buss for an hour after school. I'm sure they love it all. Plus I'm home to cook dinner and get all the the things done I never felt I had the time or energy for.
Ian is learning to like his newest job. I'm hoping over the next year he learns that being gone five days a week isn't really a bad thing and that I am ready and willing to do what I need to at home, for the kids and for myself to make life easy and enjoyable for all of us. It's never about him being away. I miss him when he's not home. It's about making our dreams come true.
For the new year, I want to do more entries in my blog I want to start on my nursing degree. I would like to get a new car and possibly even renew my interest in Avon. I would like about ten more visits a week for my job, hopefully closer to home and during the day while the kids are at school. I want to lose weight. I gained seventy pounds in three years at the hospital. It needs to go. I am determined to be a better person this year, kinder, more giving, within reason. I will command respect, I will be the best person I can be.
No comments:
Post a Comment